Why Stress Hits Neurodivergent Brains Differently (and How to Cope with it)
Stress is a part of life, but for neurodivergent people — whether living with ADHD, autism, bipolar disorder, depression or other forms of neurodiversity — it often takes a more intense, complex form.
Neurodivergent brains handle stress differently, not just because of environmental triggers but also because of unique brain wiring that impacts the stress response.
Understanding these differences is key, as is finding practical strategies to manage stress in a way that honours these neurodivergent needs.
How the Neurodivergent Brain Handles Stress Differently
When we encounter stress, the brain’s amygdala — the emotional portion of the brain —kicks into gear, alerting us to potential threats. This reaction is usually balanced by the prefrontal cortex, which helps us regulate emotions, make decisions, and calm down.
In neurotypical brains, this stress response is more streamlined, with the amygdala and prefrontal cortex working together to return the body to a balanced state after the initial stress fades.
In neurodivergent brains, however, this response is often less efficient. The amygdala might be more reactive, while the prefrontal cortex may struggle to calm it down quickly and may go offline more easily than in those who are neurotypical.
For example, in people with ADHD, research shows that their prefrontal cortex activity can be lower, making it harder to focus and manage emotions during stressful events.
People with autism may experience heightened amygdala activity in social situations or unfamiliar environments, leading to sensory overload and prolonged stress.
Meanwhile, individuals with bipolar disorder are more likely to experience mood fluctuations during high-stress periods, due in part to a heightened cortisol (stress hormone) response.
The result? Stress can feel sharper and harder to escape, leaving neurodivergent individuals in a prolonged state of alertness or overwhelm. It’s not a matter of willpower; rather, it’s a matter of brain wiring and neurochemistry that makes stress management more challenging.
The Role of Dopamine in the Neurodivergent Stress Response
Dopamine, often called the ‘feel-good’ neurotransmitter, plays a significant role in how we handle stress. It’s key to motivation, reward, and focus, and it’s also heavily involved in managing our response to stress. In neurodivergent brains, dopamine levels and how they’re regulated can be atypical.
Dopamine’s Complex Relationship with Stress
When we encounter stress, dopamine initially surges to help us focus on the challenge at hand. This response is designed to give us the motivation to solve the problem and keep us safe.
But in times of prolonged or intense stress, dopamine levels in the prefrontal cortex can actually plummet. This drop affects our decision-making abilities and our capacity to regulate impulses. Instead, dopamine is redirected to parts of the brain associated with habit formation and emotional reactions, which doesn’t help us in moments that require clear, strategic thinking.
For neurodivergent individuals, particularly those with ADHD, dopamine is already lower in the prefrontal cortex. This means the typical motivational boost we get from dopamine during stress might be diminished or entirely absent. Instead, the brain seeks quick and easy sources of dopamine, which is why stress can lead to avoidance and procrastination. In other words, when faced with a high-stress task, the neurodivergent brain might crave low-effort, high-reward activities (like social media scrolling) instead, creating a procrastination loop that’s hard to break.
Why Triggers for Stress Differ in Neurodivergent Individuals
For neurodivergent people, triggers often go beyond the usual stresses of work, relationships, or deadlines. Here are some key triggers:
1. Sensory Overload: Sensory input like bright lights, loud sounds, or rough textures that might go unnoticed by neurotypical people can be overwhelming for those who are neurodivergent. This is especially true for individuals with autism or sensory processing disorders. An overstimulated amygdala makes it harder to calm down after these exposures, leading to chronic stress and making it more difficult to handle the ‘small’ stressors that are likely to arise throughout the day.
2. Routine Disruptions: Neurodivergent individuals, especially those on the autism spectrum, often rely on routines to feel grounded. A change in plans or an unexpected event can activate the stress response, making what seems like a minor inconvenience feel like completely overwhelming.
3. Social Interactions: Social cues can be challenging for neurodivergent people to interpret and manage. For many, social settings demand an intense level of focus, which can be exhausting and stress-inducing. Neurodivergent individuals may need longer to recover from the mental strain of these interactions, resulting in what’s known as ‘social exhaustion’
4. Mood Shifts in Bipolar Disorder: For individuals with bipolar disorder, stress can be a major trigger for mood shifts. Chronic stress is associated with increased cortisol, which can lead to manic or depressive episodes. Additionally, stress can impact sleep which is vital for keeping mood levels stable. Because of this, managing stress becomes crucial in maintaining mood stability.
Generally, people with neurodivergence are likely to have a smaller window of tolerance for stress. This means they are more likely to go into complete overwhelm when faced with stress.
How to Manage Stress as a Neurodivergent Person
Given these unique challenges, traditional stress management techniques often fall short. Here are science-backed, practical ways for neurodivergent people to handle stress in a way that aligns with their needs:
1. Create Sensory-Friendly Spaces: Reduce environmental stress by designing calming spaces. Noise-cancelling headphones, soft lighting, and comfortable textures can help.
2. Break Tasks into Small, Rewarding Steps: To counteract dopamine’s role in procrastination, try breaking tasks into smaller actions that offer a sense of accomplishment. This approach gives your brain frequent increases in dopamine without the overwhelm of tackling an entire project at once.
3. Practice Routine and Structure: Establishing routines can create a sense of predictability and control, which is grounding for many neurodivergent people. This might look like setting consistent wake-up times, meal plans, or even having a designated ‘wind-down’ routine before bed.
4. Practice Short Mindfulness Exercises: While longer meditation sessions may feel inaccessible, short mindfulness exercises like focused breathing can help regulate dopamine and cortisol. Other activities like writing out the alphabet backwards (for example) with your non-dominant hand are good because this really forces you to focus and be in the moment.
5. Set Boundaries for Dopamine-Seeking Distractions: If you find yourself reaching for easy dopamine, like social media, try to set boundaries around these activities. A simple tool like a timer can remind you to return to your task after a set period of time. Gradually, this builds resilience against procrastination.
Build Mastery: This is technique that requires you to do something every day that makes you feel confident and competent. Doing this creates a reserve of good chemical and neurotransmitters that we can return to when we feel stressed. Furthermore, feeling confident when you approach a task is generally a great way to help you work through the stress. For people who are neurodivergent, this will provide a sustained release of dopamine, which will help in regulating its release.
Distress Tolerance
If stress is a sliding scale (at one end is no stress, and at the other is complete overwhelm, where the emotional brain completely takes over) people who are neurodivergent are more likely to go into complete overwhelm more quickly and are going to find it more difficult to find that sweet spot where the prefrontal cortex stays online and you can use the stress response to your advantage.
Distress tolerance skills can be helpful in the moment. These skills are used to change the chemistry of the body quickly to start to bring you out of the overwhelm:
1. Change the Temperature: this technique involves exposing the body to cold sensations. Doing this dials down the physical stress response by slowing the heart rate and redirecting blood flow to vital organs. It also provides distraction through a sensory shift and can activate the vagus nerve, which moves us out of our ‘fight or flight’ state. If you are in the office, this could include putting your face in some cold water or putting some cold water on the back of your neck. If you are able to, putting an ice pack or something on your forehead or the back of you neck can work. Even just holding ice cubes in your hands can have an impact. Also, going outside if it’s a cold day for a few minutes will work well!
2. Paired Muscle Relaxation: this is a technique that involves purposely tensing muscle groups, in order to mindfully relax them. This works for lots of reasons, including by activating the parasympathetic nervous system through the relaxation response, interrupting the stress response and increasing mindfulness. You can do this by, starting at the feet, tensing each muscle group for 5-10 seconds and then releasing (with an exhale) for 5-10 seconds. This is an easy one to do in any environment.
3. Diaphragmatic Breathing: this is a great one and another one that you can do anywhere. For this technique, you need to soften the belly so it can rise on the inhale and deflate on the exhale. This creates space for the diaphragm to move, which signals safety to the brain, as well as triggering the vagus nerve. Try lengthening the exhale as well, following a 4:2:8 breathing pattern: inhale for 4, hold for 2, exhale for 8 (or find a ratio that suits you – so long as the exhale is longer than the inhale, it will work).
Above all, remember that neurodivergent stress responses are not character flaws or signs of weakness — they’re a reflection of unique brain wiring. Practicing self-compassion and letting go of self-judgment can create a healthier mental space where stress is more manageable. It’s about understanding individual stress responses and cycles and building resilience in these moments.